Days before the upcoming election, the federal government has committed upwards of $80 billion to build a high-speed rail line in the five mile stretch between Morden and Winkler. “There will be stops ...

In a mass display of solidarity, Canadians have banded together to eat more than 80 million heaping plates of delicious poutine in a single day. “Plus we unveiled a massive Canadian flag on our front ...

President Musk has been so busy haphazardly cutting government workers that he inadvertently fired himself this afternoon. “And the problem is it all happened so fast that now I can’t even hire myself ...

After opening up their hymnals for the first time in several years, parishioners at the Central Harrisonburg Mennonite Church were mortified to discover that they’d totally changed nearly every single ...

Winkler is finally getting its own Costco store, which will be conveniently located just an hour and a half away in Winnipeg. “Finally, Winkler’s getting a Costco!” proclaimed local man John Penner.

As of just a few days ago, young Timothy Reimer, 8, of Mountain Lake could identify several large bodies of water and many of the highest mountain peaks, which made him the country’s most ...

Area woman Diane Klippenstein has a longstanding tradition of writing “please delete if not allowed” before every single social media post. “Whether I’m selling my canned beets or inquiring what time ...

After dominating play throughout southern Manitoba in recent years, a Hutterite women’s hockey team has signed on as a last minute addition to the NHL’s 4 Nations Face-Off. “We’re calling it 5 Nations ...

Even the Canadian satire industry has not escaped Trump’s trade war, with an expected 25% tariff to be slapped on all exports of sarcasm and mockery. “We don’t need Canada’s jokes. We have our own ...

Area man Garth Eby, 39, has just begun a yearlong project to dissemble every stitch of furniture in his house and replace all the screws with Robertsons. “I’m starting with the kitchen cabinets, ...

The Third Mennonite Church of Goshen has had a burned-out lightbulb for more than three months, all due to the fact that members could not agree on how and when and who should change the bulb. “So we ...

Responding to an executive order by President Trump, Google Maps has begun showing the state of New Mexico as New ‘Murica, although the label only appears when accessing the site from within the ...